While assault typically refers to a singular act of violence, abuse is a pattern of harmful and/or violent behaviour. Abuse can take many forms, including:

• Physical abuse
• Sexual abuse
• Verbal or emotional abuse
• Financial abuse
• Social abuse
• Abuse facilitated
• Harassment and/or stalking
• Environmental abuse
• Spiritual or Religious Abuse

Gender-based violence often—but not always—involves some form of sexual violence.

Warning signs of abuse may go unnoticed. Becoming familiar with them will help you assess your own situation or that of someone you may know.

• Feel like you have to “walk on eggshells” to keep them from getting angry and are frightened by their temper;
• Feel like you can’t live without them;
• Stop seeing other friends or family or give up activities you enjoy because they doesn’t like them;
• Are afraid to tell them your worries and feeling about the relationship;
• Are often complacent because you are afraid to hurt their feelings and have the urge to “rescue” them when they are in trouble;
• Unfairly accuses you of being unfaithful all the time;
• Find yourself apologizing to yourself or others for your partner’s behavior when you are treated badly;
• Stop expressing opinions if they don’t agree with them;
• Stay because you feel they will kill themselves if you leave;
• Believe that their jealousy is a sign of love;
• Blames you for their violence;
• Believe the critical things they says to make you feel bad about yourself;
• Believe that there is something wrong with you if you don’t enjoy the sexual things they make you do;
• They treat you like you are their property;
• Begin to wonder if you’re the one who is “crazy”.

Coercive control is a term developed by Evan Stark to help us understand abuse as more than a “fight”. It is a pattern of behaviour that seeks to take away the victim’s liberty or freedom, to strip away their sense of self. It is not just women’s bodily integrity that is violated but also their human rights. It seeks to explain the repeated, ongoing, and intentional control tactics used by perpetrators and the impact of those actions on survivors. Those tactics may be physical, sexual, economic, psychological, legal, institutional, or all of the above.

Some examples of coercive control are:

• unreasonable and non-negotiable demands;
• stalking and surveillance;
• restricting daily activities;
• manipulation through minimization, denial, lies, promises;
• controlling access to information and services;
• threats and negative consequences for non-compliance.